Talking with your elderly family member about funeral plans may not be a conversation that you are looking forward to. Truthfully, she may have been putting it off, too. But you don’t want to run out of time completely.
Mention an Intent to Talk about End-of-life Planning
This might be a topic that’s on your mind and on your senior’s, but if you haven’t already been talking about it, it’s a good idea to open the door, so to speak. Mention to your elderly family member that it’s a good idea to start talking about what she wants from the end of her life. Let her know you’re both going to take time to collect your thoughts, unless she’s ready to talk now.
Collect any Information that Might Be Helpful
After you make a plan for when to talk with your senior in more depth it’s time to start collecting some information. Start also making a list of questions for you and your elderly family member to address. Is she open to having hospice elder care services when that time comes? Does she want to be at home for as long as possible or does she have other plans? What does she want from her funeral service? Has she decided whether she wants to be cremated or buried, or is there another option she’s considered?
Focus on What Matters Most to Your Senior
Ultimately what you’re looking for is a way to focus on the issues that matter the most to your elderly family member. Some people want to help with every bit of preplanning the funeral or memorial service. Other people are fine leaving that up to family members, as long as certain specifics are addressed.
Don’t Feel Bad if This Takes More than One Conversation
This is a deep conversation and there is probably a lot for you and your elderly family member to go over. If you end up revisiting the topic even after a long talk, that’s still fine. It can take more time than one talk to work through all of the different threads that you and your elderly family member want to work through.
If this conversation is still a hard one for you and your senior to get through, you’re not alone. But giving up because it’s tough is not a great idea. Do what you can to help your elderly family member to put a plan together.
IF YOU ARE CONSIDERING ELDER CARE IN GRASS VALLEY, CA, FOR AN AGING LOVED ONE, PLEASE CONTACT THE CARING STAFF AT PIC COMFORT CARE TODAY. CALL (530) 885-9948.
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